Justify my life( A short Story)


I still remembered the pool of blood lying beside the girl’s body, in a badly mutilated state, I still could feel the coldness near the Childs body, and I still could feel the child taking its breadth one by one when she used to come to my place, still wanted the child to live. Don’t know what led her to take that decision, but she had already done that, left this world with no questions and no answers to those questions. Only left was her cold body and all those things that reminded of that beautiful smile and those honest efforts of hers. I was tired by the day’s events and came back home a bit late thinking about all those things that had passed, and all those feelings that had gone through me touching me everywhere and giving me all the intentional wounds. I was there in front of my door, took out my keys and opened it without putting an effort, I went inside my room, I could still see the cup off coffee lying on my table, which in the morning I had in my hands when I had received a call from the hostel, telling me about the girls state, when I took the cup in my hands I could feel the coldness I remembered the child’s body again…….. I sat on my chair in front of my writing table thinking about something, don’t know what , but still I was thinking about something , something was going inside my mind but I was totally oblivious of what was going on inside me, I put my heads down with my hands on them and was nearly about to sleep. Suddenly I heard a knock my door, I woke from my thoughts , and couldn’t realize what was happening , it was only after the third knock did I realize that there was someone on my door wanting to come in, I shouted Come in. Knowing that I had not bolted the door while coming in ,no one came in , but gain there was a knock on the door, Come in I shouted again ,no response, finally I decided to go and see it for myself ,I opened the door and saw a man of around forty -forty five years of age, tall and muscular , should have been around 6.2’,huge forehead ,hairs all falling over his forehead ,big eyes ,and these eyes spoke a lot ,a long nose and nice but black lips ,which gave me a general impression that he smoked a lot well dressed. Blue blazers and a grey pant, White shirt, the top two buttons were open, in this chilling winter, I wonder what gave him to much heat to leave those buttons open, I was shivering even though I had an inner then a shirt then a cardigan and then my Russian blazer on top, and accompanying those was a muffler my mom had sent me for the winters, and a cap on my head. Hi, this is kishore  do you remember? I’m from Darjeeling, Not recognizing who he is, I told him that I was very sorry that I did not recognize him at all, he said its fine, can I come in, he said, I invited him inside and gave him a chair to sit down, I pulled a chair for myself and then asked him how could I help him. He asked don’t u seriously remember me, I said no, to which he said, I m Kishore, I studied in St.Josephs School Darjeeling . Kishore: I was in class eight when my father was transferred to Darjeeling, and I had to change my school too, so I joined North Point. It took me three months to adjust my self to the new environment during which I was always sick. That is why I couldn’t attended my school most of the time, that is why I could not make much friends and also academically I was way behind others, so I had a small talk with my class teacher and that we came to just but one conclusion, that I had to spend the rest of my term working harder so that I could cope up with all that had been done in the class. So I decided to give some more time to my studies and spend some time in the library, since there was only one library pretty near to my place, the Deshbandhu District Library, which was three minutes walk from Chowrashta. So every evening after my school I used to be there in the library for the next three hours. the first few days was very lonely, but one day while I was going through few books in the history section, a soft voice spoke from behind., what book are you looking for, I turned around and saw the most beautiful and peaceful face in my life, I was stunned for sometime, couldn’t speak for a while and was also blushing, I knew it because I could feel the hot blood all over my face. Any way’s after sometime I answered shyly, I m looking for the book on modern history, where can I get it? I asked. oh that book, its there on the top of the third rack, she said, hey but there are many ,which writer are u looking for, I didn’t know which writer would write history the best, so I said don’t no any one will do, she went unto the rack, looked through a few and picked one of them and gave it to me, and said this is good and has lots of details. That was how we got introduced, her name was Noosa, and she was the most charming personality I had ever met in my life………when I reached home I remembered nothing but her face and her voice, my mind said that I was in love and had no other thing in mind, my mind was not mine ,my soul betrayed me everyday every moment, my emotions ,sentiments and my feelings all started betraying me , after a couple of days , I met her again , afraid I would tell her about my feelings , I tried avoiding her, but failed. at last tried my best to be normal , with countless beats of my heart I said , I LOVE you. Love , was it? Dont know but had never felt anything like this before and thank god she felt the same , it took us three years to understand each other the best and we knew we were for each other, finally asking our virgin mind the permission we decided to get married, we decided we will talk top our parents that very day, Asking their [permisson was just a normal and easy procedure I thought , I was wrong , our parents went against our decided future, both our parents didn’t think we were good enough for each other, my parents gave their own reasons and hers theirs. NO remedy for the hypocrisy of the being called HUMANS. Within a week my bags were packed and was sent to KURD, a place were my paternal uncle ran his business of KITES,I reached there ,passing through Peshawar and the Khyber pass , I thought many times to return but it was difficult as I had left but anyways I reached there and quickly picked up the tricks of the trade. In the mean time I did try to get in touch with her , every time I tried I failed, and end of every day I thought I will go back and get her, time passed I got more involved in the business, today we are the best manufactures of kites not only in KURD but we also export it to other countries like the STATES and central Europe .Eighteen years had passed I was still single , still waiting still in love. Then my uncle passed away , this I thought was to opportunity to take a small break from work. I came to India in search of my soul, when I reached home I got the news that the day I had gone away from my home this lady had also been send to some other place called Shillong which is in the North east side of our country, any how I got there and tried looking for her , the information I got was shocking I came to know that she had given birth to a girl child a few months after she had come to this place, and died when she gave this new child a life to live. Initially it was difficult to get any information about this child , but I was sure to get it at any cost , for I knew that this was my child , as during our small span of life together we might have had we did show our presence to each other , that confirmed that this was my child. It took me three months to locate my child in Delhi and today when I went to her place I was told that she committed suicide yesterday evening and the body is with the police for further investigation. One of my friends had given me your number in case I might need some help, I told him that I had met you before and I hope you would remember me .Writer: I was shocked to know that the girl whom he was talking about was the same child whom I had tutored for the last few years, still shocked I got up from my chair got hold of his arms asked him to come with me,got my car and moved towards the police station. Crashed in front of the police station and went inside in such a hurry the officer when he saw me was so moved that he came forward and offered me a seat and told me to calm down and tell what I had to say. I told him everything, then he made few calls here and there finally came with an answer. the body had been cremated after all investigations were over .

Protagonist to the writer: see what have you done to me , you created me , you gave me life, u gave me enormous wounds to live with , u gave me suffering , you took everything away from me i dint say even a word, the only thing I owned in life , my daughter even her I have lost today. Sir, please justify my life.

 Writer to the readers: I had no other to this ending as I have never seen any, if you think there could be better ending please justify this persons life.

 

 

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